Category: Beautiful People

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Beautiful Deeds Beautiful People

Manners 101

Manners 101 If this book was given to me, I would wonder that there’s a message by such a gift – that perhaps I am not polite enough – but this was a book a friend had for her book sale/giveaway and I thought to check if my value system aligns with what’s being said in this particular book – reads “Good upbringing, good manners that serves as the best weapon to achieve success” ??? well, well, well. Good to compare with Emily Post’s Etiquette 101:)

Really does not matter if you have a PhD or MS or BA. Does not matter what your IQ may be. Does not matter how many followers you have on social media. Whatever the degree or wealth, it’s the upbringing… knowing the TPO being aware of your audience and above all … not acting out of ego, thereby hurting others.

Negative Vibes are put out by people who always point to the shortcomings and deficiencies of people, place and culture – a major TURNOFF…especially at this time when we are bombarded with hateful speech and negative news, if we let ourselves be totally open and unguarded.

More than any theories and pontithicating and critiquing – on what we all already know if you read enough news, what we want is someone with good manners – not in the old fashion way but having the social grace to utter the words filled with positive energy to make us feel a little better… Knowing to be mindful in the words we speak. What are you communicating? And why? To speak intentionally and with awareness.

NVC – it’s more than ever to speak with good intentions as everything you say … counts. Thank you for uttering those beautiful words that heal and rejuvinate and recoginize the good in people.

Top 10 toxic words that are not swear words and slangs:

  1. Words that undermine the good efforts of others to make a difference.
  2. Words that undermine the good efforts of others to bring about peace.
  3. Words that criticize and critique not for the intention to improve, but to negate the positive efforts – sheer complaining without taking any action to make the change.
  4. Words strung together in the overall, reflect a total lack of tact or diplomacy. Wars get started over misunderstandings … but being frank and direct is also important.
  5. Words that shame, belittle and punish.
  6. Words that are veiled, in that the facade, fake but hides a negative agenda borne out of bitterness, envy or self-hate.
  7. Words that suck up to the powerful and the rich; but disdains, ignores or discredits the less fortunate.
  8. Words of complicity …
  9. Words of entitlement …
  10. Words of discrimination and elitesm borne out of inferiority complex or some insecurites about one’s status.

Including myself, we can do better.

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Beautiful People Beautiful Places Beautiful Rituals

3 years ago …Mt Shasta

I worry about the quality of air and life there so impacted by the wild fires. Praying 🙏 for safely and wellness of all. It was beautiful there with this awe inspiring artist all the way from Japan. So honored to hear her story and… her music. Lovely vibe. Delicious refreshing air back then …

And

Delicious pure water.

What can we do to change or halt the course of global warming to preserve gifts of nature here in the Golden State ?

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Beautiful People Healthy Living

All in favor of NVC

“As we’ve seen, all criticism, attack, insults, and judgments vanish when we focus attention on hearing the feelings and needs behind a message. The more we practice in this way, the more we realize a simple truth: behind all those messages we’ve allowed ourselves to be intimidated by are just individuals with unmet needs appealing to us to contribute to their well-being. When we receive messages with this awareness, we never feel dehumanized by what others have to say to us. We only feel dehumanized when we get trapped in derogatory images of other people or thoughts of wrongness about ourselves. ”

Marshall B. Rosenberg, Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships

This is an interesting take …during this challenging times when increasing numbers suffer from anxiety and depression, how would this idea be interpreted ? It could be that many have come to face to face with the undeniable truth … a recognizion of having lived a pre- pandemic, so called “normal” life that was actually NOT so authentic – have we been living a life true to ourselves? Or – have some of us merely faking it ? Complicit in role-playing and living a fake life to please others at the expense of one’s own deeper needs and wants … could it be that ?

“My theory is that we get depressed because we’re not getting what we want, and we’re not getting what we want because we have never been taught to get what we want. Instead, we’ve been taught to be good little boys and girls and good mothers and fathers. If we’re going to be one of those good things, better get used to being depressed. Depression is the reward we get for being “good.” But, if you want to feel better, I’d like you to clarify what you would like people to do to make life more wonderful for you.”

Marshall B. Rosenberg, Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life

When one’s own mortality is felt to be fragile, when lives and relationships appear fleeting, the world out of control, what is it that one can trust and depend on ? What’s still within our own control? What is forever to be trusted and relied upon ?

A dear friend who recently had a huge setback of a loss said to me earnestly ” You know, I only have maybe another XX good years left if I am lucky … so I want to spend them with family and friends like you …”.

Yes. Our needs are sifted, filtered, and distilled, wants are clearly defined, and our heart and soul untethered to seek what’s authentic and real. Out of fear, we had been fooling ourselves leading a distracted life – but the Pandemic has reminded us this: We don’t have eternity on this earth. Life on earth is quite finite; So we come to relish each breath, each hour, each day as life as we know it is no longer guaranteed – so with that in mind – gratitude for today, this life. Our intentions are clearer; we know what we want. We cannot afford to waste or play a game, act in a charade, winging at this thing called life. We live it like our lives depends on it in full awareness.